A Question Entertained

A friend, who has been reading these posts, asked me, "Okay. But how do I create a personal purpose statement for myself?"

Here, at the beginning, I am confronted with a choice. Does the blog include "how-to" bits? If not, then what should I do with the "how-to" requests? My initial intent was that the blog should be a forum to spark questions, but not to answer them. I thought to provide another forum for the "how-to" pieces. That forum does not yet exist.

I will continue with my original intent unless it becomes untenable (i.e., I am overwhelmed by "how-to" requests). Yet, because the "how-to" forum does not yet exist, I will pay attention to the "how-to" questions but not treat them at any length.

The process (yes, process) to craft a personal purpose statement is not about the statement itself so much as it is about self-discovery. The process, briefly, is outlined below.

INVENTORY

The first step in the process is to identify myself. That means I examine myself--who do I believe I am? What do I think I believe? What do I think is important to me? What do I think I value? Who do I think I value? These are "what" questions. It is, in a sense, the taking of an inventory of what comprises me. Paper and pen (or digital format and keyboard) are in order. There are plenty of sources to assist in this process--none that I will mention specifically lest it be taken as either an endorsement or as the only available and worthwhile resources. This step needs to be thorough, and the list created complete.

REDUCTION

The second step is reduce myself to my core self. I do that by asking "why" questions and making adjustments based on the answers. If I believe the moon is made of green cheese, why do I believe that? This step requires complete honesty. It can be uncomfortable, unsettling, even brutal. In truth I may not be able to state why I believe the moon is made of green cheese, or if I can then the "why" may be embarrassing to admit (even to myself). In this process I may find discomfort so intense that it forces me to make some change on the spot. I may abandon some things I thought I believed or valued once I understand why I believed or valued the particular thing. Other things may be adjusted. The face-to-face realization that some things that I hold dear do not survive scrutiny, and/or the process of letting go, can be unsettling or even painful.

The object of this reduction step is to reduce who I am to my core. When I peel away the things that do not survive scrutiny, I am left with the things I cannot peel away--my core. Again, I should make note of who my core is.

IS MY CORE WHO I WANT TO BE?

When I reduce myself to my core, I need to ask whether that person I am is the person I want to be. This means, of course, I should know who I want to be. The "who I want to be" is the basis for my personal purpose statement. Unfortunately, I find I cannot articulate "who I want to be" until I get a clear picture of who I actually am.

CHANGE

Finally, I need to make changes to become the person I want to be.



Speaking for myself only, when I go through this process (and I do periodically) I always see that my perception of myself is often wrong, and sometimes significantly wrong in very significant areas of my life. The process is never easy and is often unpleasant, and sometimes painful. It is comfortable to be self-unaware.